Fed is best.

Another highly requested blog post....
Hello there my readers! I hope you are all doing well! If this is your first time reading one of my blog posts, welcome! Today I am again writing another post that has been requested- my views on bottle vs breast and how you first establish feeding. I did touch on this in my breastfeeding blog post but I have been asked to go more in depth, so that's what I am doing. I hope you enjoy!

Figuring out feeding...
Before I even get into the whole "debate" I was asked by a reader how do you know what to do? When to feed the baby etc? This being something you only really find out when you have a baby - no matter how many parenting for idiot books you read. Being a mum who has now experienced both breast and bottle feeding I can put across how I figured it out as timing, routine etc is different with the two different types of feeding.

Breastfeeding- 
Breastfeeding is 100% on demand. You can try your hardest to time feedings but ultimately the baby is in charge. As far as I am aware from speaking to my midwife and health visitor (but don't quote me I am not a medical professional) you cannot over feed on breast milk and babies can feed every hour or more. Ella-Grace cluster fed, meaning she would be on and off, on and off my breast whenever she was awake. Partly for comfort and obviously because she was hungry. So to answer the question when it comes to breastfeeding you don't really know how much they are getting as you would when measuring a bottle and over-feeding is not possible so the timing and 'knowing what to do' isn't really a thing, you do as the baby demands. This being my knowledge from my experience. If you are worried about whether your baby is getting enough milk though (as I was when I came home from hospital) you can track feeds as well as dirty nappies that way you will get an idea of if your baby is getting enough. The way I did this was through an app on my phone where you would log each dirty nappy and time each feed. If Ella-Grace was feeding for longer than 10 mins and less than 1 hour then pulling away and having dirty nappies following this, I was assured that she was doing well. All babies are different though so as I said you really just have to listen to your baby and don't be scared to ask for help if you need to. The amount of questions I have asked the health visitor I'm surprised her head didn't explode haha.

Bottle feeding- 
Bottle feeding is a lot more scheduled, with set amounts and timings. On the formula tin it has guidelines as to how much your baby should eat and how often depending on their age. Ella-Grace (almost 4 months old) now has 180 mls, every 3-4 hours. I personally do not wake her up from her sleep for a feed every 4 hours, I know some people think you should but Ella-Grace has a good sleeping pattern now. She sleeps through the whole night and I don't want to mess that up and confuse her sleeping pattern by waking her up for a feed. Through the day though, yes she gets fed every 4 hours. You can overfeed on formula and formula fed babies are likely to get worse reflux and trapped wind (from what I can remember the health visitor telling me) so you do have to be careful with timings and not to overfeed your baby when on formula, hence why I feed her no less than 3 hours apart. I also burp her half way through her bottle now as she can struggle burping otherwise.

Again I am not a medical professional and I am NOT trying to tell you how to feed/look after your baby, I was asked to write about how a new mum figures out feeding hence why I am writing this. This is my experience and opinion.

Fed is best...
Referring to the title of this post 'Fed is best'. I decided to title it this instead of 'Breast is best' or Breast vs Bottle' because my belief is that feeding your baby, whether that is breast, bottle or both, that is really what is best and judging anyone based on how they are feeding their baby is no good for anyone, including the baby. So whatever way you feed your baby, well done your doing a great job.

Short recap on my feeding experience...
My last full post on feeding I was exclusively breast feeding Ella-Grace with the occasional bottle night from her Dad. Wow, how things can change. In Ella-Graces 3 month update I mentioned that I am now bottle feeding, no breast. Just before Ella-Grace was 2 months old she was having really bad reflux, which progressed to her not keeping down my breastmilk.. at all! She would feed, spew, feed, spew.. a never ending cycle. We then found out she was lactose intolerant and decided to try her on lacto-free formula which worked wonders, still a bit of reflux but she was keeping her food down. I adored breast feeding Ella-Grace and once I had cut all the dairy out of my diet I tried to wean her back onto the breast but even with all the pumping I did, my milk supply had drastically reduced and Ella-Grace was confused/upset with the lack of milk and switching between two different feeding methods. This is when Reece and I decided, bottle feeding was the way to go. Disappointing for me aas I was very keen to breastfeed Ella-Grace for as long as I could but now we have been bottle feeding Ella-Grace for almost 2 months now I do not regret our decision. It helped Ella-Grace and Reece bond more and to be honest Ella-Grace and myself are 10x calmer and happier, our routine is going well and I think this has been the best decision for our family.

Unnecessary Judgement...
I have touched on this subject in another blog post before so sorry if I am repeating myself but again this was what was requested of me and I am more than happy to oblige.
So to put it plain and simple my opinion on this debate over bottle or breast is-not to be rude but- mind your own business. So sorry if that sounds abrupt but I just think fair enough you have your own opinion on how you think children should be fed but unless someone asks for your opinion, keep that for your children. Don't push it on someone else or make someone else feel bad if their feeding arrangement for their child is different to yours. I have first hand experience in being judged for stopping breastfeeding and I cant explain how much that hurt, I adored breastfeeding and if I could of I would of continued for a very long time but it just wasn't meant to be. I would prefer my baby to be happy and gaining weight on bottle rather than spewing up my breast milk and screaming non stop just because 'breast is best. Don't get me wrong as I have said before my opinion is yes, of course breast milk is best. Your body makes that milk specifically for your baby but that in no way means bottle feeding mums should be judged or called bad mums for choosing that route of feeding. We should all be supporting each other because do you know what really matters? Not how a baby is being fed and whether you view that good or bad but that the baby is just being looked after thats what matters, that we are all trying our best as parents and whether that baby is breast or bottle fed, that baby is loved and with all the awful things that happen in the world and all the rotten things people can do judging fellow mums based on feeding when we are all just trying our best is not only ignorant but so very unkind. Stop this unnecessary judgement, start supporting each other.

So....
So the next time you see a mum bottle feeding their new born instead of judging the fact they are not breastfeeding, go over and say hi- you might make a friend. Next time you see a mum breastfeeding in public and you see people making comments, don't join the snarky remarks-stand up for your fellow mother. Cause we are all just doing the best we can and as someone said to me once, if your worrying whether your doing the right thing, whether you are a good mum or not.. you already are one. Cause at the end of the day no matter how each baby is fed, I can almost guarantee that they will all be so loved and cared for and that right there is what matters.
So stop this silly debate, it shouldn't be a debate. Forget about 'breast vs bottle' and just support each other and spread love, you never know what that mum and baby have been through. Everyone has a different story, we just have to care enough to not judge the cover.

Till next time...
I hope that makes sense, I know I kind of rambled on near the end there. Thanks again for reading and all the support I have received, Why not leave a comment and let me know your feelings on this topic? How do you feed your baby? Till next time.

Stay Happy Everyone :) !